Home Is Where We Start From by D. W. Winnicott

Author:D. W. Winnicott
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: W. W. Norton & Company

Death and Murder in the Adolescent Process

I now jump to the re-enactment of these matters as they affect the task of parents when their children are at puberty, or in the throes of adolescence.

Although a great deal is being published concerning the individual and social problems that appear in this decade, wherever adolescents are free to express themselves, there may be room for a further personal comment on the content of adolescent fantasy.

In the time of adolescent growth, boys and girls awkwardly and erratically emerge out of childhood and away from dependence, and grope towards adult status. Growth is not just a matter of inherited tendency; it is also a matter of a highly complex interweaving with the facilitating environment. If the family is still there to be used, it is used in a big way; and if the family is no longer there to be used, or to be set aside (negative use), then small social units need to be provided to contain the adolescent growth process. The same problems loom at puberty that were present in the early stages when these same children were relatively harmless toddlers or infants. It is worth noting that if you have done well at the early stages and are still doing well, you cannot count on a smooth running of the machine. In fact, you can expect troubles. Certain troubles are inherent at these later stages.

It is valuable to compare adolescent ideas with those of childhood. If, in the fantasy of early growth, there is contained death, then at adolescence there is contained murder. Even when growth at the period of puberty goes ahead without major crises, one may need to deal with acute problems of management, because growing up means taking the parent’s place. It really does. In the unconscious fantasy, growing up is inherently an aggressive act. And the child is now no longer child-size.

It is legitimate, I believe, as well as useful, to look at the game ‘I’m the King of the Castle’. This game belongs to the male element in boys and girls. (The theme could also be stated in terms of the female element in girls and boys, but I cannot do this here.) This is a game of early latency, and at puberty it becomes changed into a life-situation.

‘I’m the King of the Castle’ is a statement of personal being. It is an achievement of individual emotional growth. It is a position that implies the death of all rivals or the establishment of dominance. The expected attack is shown in the next words: ‘And you’re the dirty rascal’ (or ‘Get down, you dirty rascal’). Name your rival and you know where you are. Soon the dirty rascal knocks the King over and in turn becomes King. The Opies (1951) refer to this rhyme. They say that the game is exceedingly old, and that Horace (20 BC) gives the children’s words as:

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